December 26, 2011

The Day After Christmas - a Poem....

Too funny! There are a few versions of this poem floating around. Figured everyone can use a chuckle as they wind down, and gear up for - after Christmas sales! Enjoy!

The Day After Christmas
Author Unknown

It's one day after Christmas, I'm crabby and I'm broke.

I'm so full of ham and fruitcake I think I'm gonna croak.

It's nice to see the relatives, I wonder when they'll leave.

They've been camping in my bathroom since early Christmas Eve.

They're eating everything in sight and sleeping in my bed.

I been sacked out in the basement with my spotted beagle, Fred.

The relatives have all gone out and left their screaming brats.

The toilet bowl is all plugged up and I can't find the cat.

It's Christmastime at my house, the relatives are here.

They eat me out of house and home, and drink up all my beer.

I love the decorations, and the sleigh bells in the snow,

But I wish those pesky relatives, would take their kids and go.

Those cookie crunchers fed the dog a twenty pound rib of roast.

His feet are sticking in the air, like skinny old fence posts.

Now they're in a free-for-all, the girls against the boys.

They're fighting over boxes, 'cause they're bored with all their toys.

My mother-in-law is snoring in my favorite TV chair.

Those kids are stringing lights on her and tinseling her hair.

I oughta wake her up before the fireworks begin.

But I wanna see those blue sparks fly, when they plug her in.