Too funny! There are a few versions of this poem floating around. Figured everyone can use a chuckle as they wind down, and gear up for - after Christmas sales! Enjoy!
The Day After Christmas
It's one day after Christmas, I'm crabby and I'm broke.
I'm so full of ham and fruitcake I think I'm gonna croak.
It's nice to see the relatives, I wonder when they'll leave.
They've been camping in my bathroom since early Christmas Eve.
They're eating everything in sight and sleeping in my bed.
I been sacked out in the basement with my spotted beagle, Fred.
The relatives have all gone out and left their screaming brats.
The toilet bowl is all plugged up and I can't find the cat.
It's Christmastime at my house, the relatives are here.
They eat me out of house and home, and drink up all my beer.
I love the decorations, and the sleigh bells in the snow,
But I wish those pesky relatives, would take their kids and go.
Those cookie crunchers fed the dog a twenty pound rib of roast.
His feet are sticking in the air, like skinny old fence posts.
Now they're in a free-for-all, the girls against the boys.
They're fighting over boxes, 'cause they're bored with all their toys.
My mother-in-law is snoring in my favorite TV chair.
Those kids are stringing lights on her and tinseling her hair.
I oughta wake her up before the fireworks begin.
But I wanna see those blue sparks fly, when they plug her in.
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